She has also just wrapped up a ballet class at a local community center. Unfortunately, I'm not really sure she enjoyed it so we are going to try something a little different soon. There is a place nearby that offers toddler tumbling classes I am going to look into. I think she would enjoy that...and if not...there are plenty of other things to try! She just loves being with other kids! I may have mentioned that I have her with a sitter two days a week now. V loves that time with the other kids and pretty much races me to the car on those mornings. I must admit that I do love picking her up in the afternoon and having her run to me with arms open yelling, "Mommy!" I find that everyday my heart swells a little more with love for that little girl. All I want for her is happiness and security and stability. I just want her to have a full and complete life without a million worries. I don't know that I will be able to give her that...but I am going to try my hardest. I have to put her first and do what is right for her life.
As for me, school is school. I am about to wrap up my first semester and it has kicked my tail. This semester I took five classes when normally I will just be taking three from here on out. Jumping into school with both feet has been hard, rewarding, but hard. I am already ready to be done! Wouldn't it be nice if you could get your MBA in just one semester?!?
With regards to general life direction, I have no clue. The divorce is final and I am a single woman. The house is on the market and I am just waiting for an offer to finalize that portion of this battle. I am relieved that it is over and I have no desire to return to that portion of my life but I am finding that the uncertainty of where I am now is uber-stressful. Not knowing where I will be in a year gets me sometimes. Today I sit here in a silent house surrounded by laundry and to do lists completely melancholy. It's a little scary to think that you really can't count on anyone except God. That is a frightening realization that I have wrestled with for months. Sometimes I think that there is another truth. That maybe that isn't concrete, but somehow I always end up right back here. That's not to say that family can't be counted on or that a friend won't drop everything to come hold your hand. Sometimes it is just hard to accept that things aren't always what they seem.
The only truth I can be sure of is that I must be faithful to God and He will support me. Maybe not in the way I would expect Him to, but in the way that I need Him to. No lesson is in vain, and no test should be too hard with His love.
