A month has passed and things are very similar to the last time I checked in.  V is growing like a weed and is sporting some 5t clothes in the rotation.  I am going to be forced to start chopping off appendages soon if she wants me to continue carrying her around all the time!  She is now in a big girl car seat...which as many of you may know is a huge freedom for me!  No more five point harness to adjust and cram bulky jackets into.  The cutest part is that she can let herself out now.  So, anytime we stop she asks very politely is she can push her "buddon."  In Vionese this means she is asking to take her seatbelt off.  I never get tired of it :)

She has also just wrapped up a ballet class at a local community center.  Unfortunately, I'm not really sure she enjoyed it so we are going to try something a little different soon.  There is a place nearby that offers toddler tumbling classes I am going to look into.  I think she would enjoy that...and if not...there are plenty of other things to try!  She just loves being with other kids!  I may have mentioned that I have her with a sitter two days a week now.  V loves that time with the other kids and pretty much races me to the car on those mornings.  I must admit that I do love picking her up in the afternoon and having her run to me with arms open yelling, "Mommy!"  I find that everyday my heart swells a little more with love for that little girl.  All I want for her is happiness and security and stability.  I just want her to have a full and complete life without a million worries.  I don't know that I will be able to give her that...but I am going to try my hardest.  I have to put her first and do what is right for her life.

As for me, school is school.  I am about to wrap up my first semester and it has kicked my tail.  This semester I took five classes when normally I will just be taking three from here on out.  Jumping into school with both feet has been hard, rewarding, but hard.  I am already ready to be done!  Wouldn't it be nice if you could get your MBA in just one semester?!?

With regards to general life direction, I have no clue.  The divorce is final and I am a single woman.  The house is on the market and I am just waiting for an offer to finalize that portion of this battle.  I am relieved that it is over and I have no desire to return to that portion of my life but I am finding that the uncertainty of where I am now is uber-stressful.  Not knowing where I will be in a year gets me sometimes.  Today I sit here in a silent house surrounded by laundry and to do lists completely melancholy.  It's a little scary to think that you really can't count on anyone except God.  That is a frightening realization that I have wrestled with for months.  Sometimes I think that there is another truth.  That maybe that isn't concrete, but somehow  I always end up right back here.  That's not to say that family can't be counted on or that a friend won't drop everything to come hold your hand.  Sometimes it is just hard to accept that things aren't always what they seem.

The only truth I can be sure of is that I must be faithful to God and He will support me.  Maybe not in the way I would expect Him to, but in the way that I need Him to.  No lesson is in vain, and no test should be too hard with His love.